He was in his 90s – I never imagined he would sexually assault me

He was in his 90s – I never imagined he would sexually assault me

I had always believed that if I ever faced sexual assault, I’d stand up to the perpetrator. Yet when it actually occurred, I was left completely paralyzed. I didn’t scream – I couldn’t even form words.

It was a 90-something-year-old man – someone I had viewed as a wise, dependable mentor – who smiled at me with a confident, almost smug expression after the incident. His hand moved swiftly, inserting itself into my jumper as if savoring the moment of my distress. The action felt methodical, almost like a routine step in a larger sequence.

Later, the teacher invited me to join a new class. His assistant, a man in his 30s, was present the entire time, watching silently. When I opened my eyes, I glanced toward him for support, but he merely looked away, signaling his involvement in the abuse.

Ironically, I felt too ashamed to confront the teacher directly. The idea of exposing his actions in front of others seemed overwhelming. It was also confusing how the sexual assault was woven into an exercise, making it feel like part of a lesson rather than a personal attack.

The Campaign Against Sexual Violence

On November 25, 2024, Metrolaunched This Is Not Right, a campaign to tackle the persistent issue of violence against women. Partnering with Women’s Aid, the initiative aims to highlight the severity of this national crisis.

The act took place during lockdown, a time when I, like everyone else, was confined to home. It wasn’t until then that I grasped the reality of life not being a practice run.

I had fallen in love with acting at five, dreaming of training in Los Angeles with a famed instructor. For years, I postponed the plan due to career demands. But when the urgency struck, I realized I couldn’t delay any longer. The teacher’s age added to my hesitation, yet I knew I had to act before the chance slipped away.

After the incident, I stayed in LA for another month before returning home. A week later, I received an email asking why I hadn’t shown up for my second lesson. I couldn’t believe the acting teacher had presumed I’d continue after what had transpired.

Once back home, I felt the need to share my story. Occasionally, I would mention it when something triggered the memory. I was stunned to learn how many people I spoke to had similar experiences.

Victim Support offers assistance to survivors of rape and sexual abuse. You can reach them at 0333 300 6389.